Saturday, February 28, 2009
maybe because i'm a bit free at work now, plus its the emo time of the month, so my mind starts to wander off and i think about things again. this time, the topic was on regrets. somehow, it seems like most of the major life decisions i had to make involved choosing between one or the other. despite being happy with my choices, i always wonder "what would it have been like if..." Perhaps its not so much regret per se, but wondering what the grass on the other side would have looked like. there are plenty of crossroads (seemingly small now, but big at that time) that i have come across; or like, wondering why i did things a certain way? why couldnt i have done it another way to achieve a better outcome? That sorta thing.
ok it sounds very business analytical but it involves things closer to the heart, like friendships and such. how could i have put in more effort to maintain or develop the relationships not easily forged. im not very good at that...
and also plenty of the more serious decisions, concerning studies and career.
But then yq very kindly reminds me that its all a butterfly effect. if i hadnt taken certain paths at crossroads then perhaps things wouldnt have turned out the way they are now. and that no one is here by chance.
and maybe the main reason why i'm emoing is because i've got everything going all good for me now :) And i have every reason to be thankful, yet i'm not, i'm here lusting after the bygones. Tsk, the strange fickleness and greed of thy human heart.
Mrs Brightside at 1:03 am
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Don Quijote by Miguel De Cervantes
East and West by Christ Patten
Hong Kong by Jan Morris
Le Peau de chagrin by Honoré de Balzac
1984 by George Orwell
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